It will be interesting to see how many months in a row Twilight stars show up on magazine covers. How the hell else are you going to keep the momentum going until November or whenever the hell Breaking Dawn pt. 1 comes out? Remember: BOTH Deathly Hallows installments will have been released in the space between Eclipse and BD1. Sure, Deathly Hallows pt. 1 failed to break all of Eclipse's box-office records, but Deathly Hallows pt. 2 is going to blow that shit to pieces. And Twilight's going to have to get up off the mat fast. Motherfuckers in the Summit Entertainment marketing department are chained to their desks right now, trying to figure out a way to keep Twilight names and faces in the news for 10 more god damn months. Not an enviable position, you know? For now, we have Ashley Greene on the cover of Cosmopolitan in January, and Kristen Stewart on Vogue for February. Whereas Greene's cover/photo spread was flattering (if I wasn't a gentlemen I'd say something like sideboobilicious), Stewart's is... something else.
I think K Stew is great and all but GAH, GET THIS AWAY FROM ME
The article itself is kind of nothing new. Hey this girl from Twilight is weird and talented! She smokes and swears! People you respect more than her say you should respect her more! A few of the sentences are really "upscale magazine"-tastic, though. Check the lede:
Kristen Stewart’s body can tell a million stories. Kinetic, she jiggles, feints, and darts as she talks, hanging back, looking off to the side, signaling resistance, a combative intelligence.
Kristen Stewart’s body can tell a million stories. Kinetic, she jiggles, feints, and darts as she talks, hanging back, looking off to the side, signaling resistance, a combative intelligence.
Uh-huh. It's like there's nothing you can do about writing like this, you just have to stand there and let it happen to you. If you are interested in doing that, you can read the article here. If you are more interested in seeing Kristen Stewart bear more than a passing resemblance to Cleatus The Slack-Jawed Yokel, the slideshow of photographs (by Mario Testino) is here.
We'll meet back here next month when Taylor Lautner graces the cover of GQ, or perhaps when Jackson Rathbone is featured on the cover of Basement Guitar Douchebag Monthly. Or when Ashley Greene shows up in the pages of the Atlantic again, but that one's a long shot.
2 comments:
Yikes. I saw these on Jezebel earlier and just cringed looking through them. What the hell? In the 5th one in the slideshow she looks like a transvestite.
I wonder how much they had to pay the hair, makeup and wardrobe editorial team to make an incredibly beautiful girl look so gross and dead-eyed. Because I am mediocre at all those things and would be available for photo shoots at what I imagine is a fraction of the cost of those "professionals" and I can promise to make lovely women look AT LEAST as ugly, if not more so! CALL ME, VOGUE!
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