Crazy-Ass Twilight Fan Art Gallery Weekend

Okay everybody, here is the plan for the weekend. When you get some spare time, look around Tumblr or DeviantArt or whatever crazy Twilight fan site you please, and bring me back some bonkers fan art. Don't just look for the horrible stuff, look for the stuff that actually makes you stop for a minute. For instance, the above piece is actually kind of cool, right? I like it! I don't know the name of the artist, but I got it from this tumblr. We'll try to do attribution whenever we can. Because this isn't about mocking weird fan art, exactly. It's more about begrudging, bemused, misguided appreciation. Because that, more than anything else, is what we do here. Also this weekend: The Hunger Games. Have you read it? Do you want to read it with us? Is the present tense thing going to drive me crazy? Talk about it here.

POST LINKS TO PICS IN THE COMMENTS OR @ ME ON TWITTER, I WILL POST THEM HERE. Also, if you get a 503 error from Blogger when you try to comment, just do it again right after and it will work. I don't know what's up with that.

And we are OFF TO THE RACES. Renee sends in this tattoo, which--HOLY SHIT--celebrates without irony the darkest elements of imprinting. Domestic abuse, child molestation? Totally cool as long as you are in love, or so this tattoo would seem to say. BOOOOO! YIIIIKESSSS! Okay, someone needs to find something fun now.

Via Renee again, this one is uhhhh, well, I'm not sure what this one is. Edward and Bella as mermaids? Sure, I guess! Okay, artist! You just go and do that. (via)

This photo is titled 'Twilight_Sexified.jpg" for your easy hard-drive searching needs. "Where did I put that cartoon of Jacob fucking Edward? I need it! What did I name that file? Fuck!" Thanks, Kim.

Via Claire. I have always found this kind of artwork to be vaguely upsetting. But I feel like Jacob would be into it.
A few more from Claire. Here's a fan depiction of Bella's womb!?!?

And here's a candidate for the Awkward Family Photos hall of fame. Um, the hands in Bella's stomach are fucking huge. Where is the rest of the baby? And if Renesmee is in the background cuddling up on Jacob, is Bella pregnant again? So many questions.

This is really the best one I have ever found. It's so great. God go with you, Lolypop82.
Well, sure. We were definitely missing some Confederate-worshipping art around here. Now we finally have it!
And of course, because OF COURSE, there's the action figure. Complete with slave-whipping action arm!
Also from Claire, here is the INSIDE of Bella's womb, which someone was helpful enough to construct out of a coconut or something. THANKS, PERSON! I NEEDED TO SEE THIS!

Kim just found this depiction of RENESMEE pregnant, which is maybe some kind of ironic commentary on teen mothers raising teen mothers. I hope that is what it is. This one actually has a listed artist (secretwriter07) with a DeviantArt page, so maybe we should ask them WHY, OH WHY.

There's a disconcerting amount of Jacob/Renesmee stuff out there. Why no super explicit Jasper/Alice stuff, guys? Channel your weird urges into something constructive? But anyway, Kim brings us this motherfucker, and a whole gallery of motherfuckers like it at Letters To Twilight.

Here's one artist's depiction of Alice and Jasper right before sex.

And here's one of them right after. I imagine there is usually more blood/body fluids around though. No way those sheets would stay that white. This next one is really top, though:

I love it! This picture simultaneously mocks Jasper's love of slavery, Alice's love of being an overzealous liberal (they're a regular Mary Matalin and James Carville, those two), and the artist's tenuous grasp of the English language. HAT TRICK!
Pretty bland old sexytimes, right? Well, check these out!

BOOM! Now we're getting getting there!

AHHHHHHHHHHHH! NOOOOOOOOOOO! What the hell is this? Who thought this was a good idea? At first I thought it was just a football. WHY ISN'T IT A FOOTBALL? I WISH IT WAS A FOOTBALL! Why would you send this to me, Renee? I need a palate cleanser.
Um, okay? Sure, why not. That's two Twilight/Mermaid themed pieces of art, I don't really know what to do about that.

And on that note, here's one from Yaarina in a similar style. I kinda like this one, though. Fuck you, imperialists! I can't tell is Pocahontas is happy or sad, though.