This blog never even really went full retard on the Robsten thing, because I couldn't really fit my head around it. Was it real? Was it marketing? Was it real and also marketing? How much of one and how much of the other? How aware of whatever hypothetical business arrangement that may or may not have birthed it were the gossip mags who covered it? And the fans? How does one even become a "fan" of a theoretically romance between two other fellow humans? It was easier to talk about cyberbullying and publishing and Ashley Greene's stutter step career maneuvers and other things that I could like, understand.
And then sometime around the release of Breaking Dawn pt. 1, it became clear that they really were romantically involved. It was never official, but there were actual signals. We got them. And I shifted from avoiding even thinking about it (in the same way that I avoid thinking about calculus) to just deciding that they were both really cool and that was the end of it. Why isn't that the only thing anyone knows about Robsten? "They're cool. End of story." No. Instead, it's a whole other thing. It's a celebrity romance above and beyond and below all others, amplified by all factors. The fans, the mystery, the money, etc. Which is why today was pretty weird.
Rumors spread fast this morning that US Weekly was publishing photos of Kristen Stewart kissing the director of Snow White & The Huntsman, Rupert Sanders (who is married, and 41, with children, and who cast said wife in SWATH as Kristen Stewart's mother. UNPACK THAT ONE). Before gossip sites even had time to push and pull with each other, legit news blogs were running with the story. It was up at 10:05am on The Atlantic Wire. 8:38am on Gawker. And by 3pm, Kristen Stewart had issued a public apology. WHAT?
I'm deeply sorry for the hurt and embarrassment I've caused to those close to me and everyone this has affected. This momentary indiscretion has jeopardized the most important thing in my life, the person I love and respect the most, Rob. I love him, I love him, I'm so sorry.
(Sanders issued an apology too, and it's so desperate as to be kind of appalling.) I love him, I love him, I'm so sorry. My advice to Kristen Stewart, in part, would have been: If you're going to apologize, don't word it in such a compelling, memorable way! Everybody in the world stopped for about five minutes to marvel at the directness of her statement. And then people started to wonder why it had to exist at all. Okay, not everybody did that. Some Twi-hards when into deep denial mode, cannibalizing each other in that familiar way:
(It's interesting to see that the bifurcated reality we've been dealing with for years in the political realm occurs so naturally and intuitively in the gossip realm. There's a chicken or egg thing going on. I hope Will McAvoy will touch on this in two years.) And others had the perspective to talk about who was REALLY hurt most by this. The children the fans:
But CLEAR-HEADED people wondered why the fuck a 22 year old had to apologize TO AMERICA for sleeping with a man who is not the man most people assumed she was normally fucking. How do we know what kind of lines Stewart and Pattinson have, if any? They are, as previously stated, cool, and modern, and young, and mobile as fuck.
But maybe they're not so modern. Maybe this was legit infidelity, and Stewart really wanted to get it out there. Or maybe Pattinson doesn't care and the apology was for the wife.* I don't know!
Why did it happen this way? Why does this feel more like a politician's sex scandal than a celebrity's? Twilight has always been symptom and cause of our culture's righteous attitude toward sex. Are Twilight actors really in a different cultural sphere than everyone else in Hollywood? Are we seeing the edges of the Meyer Bubble for the first time? I don't know. I'm dangerously close to where I was a few months ago, throwing up my hands rather than contemplate this shit. What do you think?
(*Or maybe, just maybe, none of them care, and Hollywood is a big sunny orgy, and they're fanning the flames to make stodgy, unfucked Twi-hards squirm and burst into tears on YouTube. That might be the way the Gossip Establishment is going to run with it. Normal media outlets are taking away their bread and butter, and when the going gets weird, the weird have to get even weirder.)
8 comments:
Up until today I thought that Rob and Kristen never actually dated? And I also never realized that anyone actually cared? But now I guess people do? Yeah, basically I am totally uninformed, which is the way I think it should be, and unopinionated, which for some people I think is unavoidable. Wait, what were we talking about again? (I agree: if she were a politician that someone had elected, an apology would make sense.)
Didn't know they were dating. Don't give a shit what they do.
I wondered if you were going to talk about this. The public statement thing is so bizarre. I am never more happy to not be famous than when shit like this is all over the internet. I shudder to think about what people who have written about some of the things I did at 22.
Obviously I take this a lot more seriously than the previous commenters. As you know, I've been firmly on the side of "they're together" from the beginning. I'm not sure what to make of this. I do love that KStew isn't capable of doing anything the Hollywood way, not even cheating or apologizing for cheating. Her statement was completely out of left field. I think that this was probably for the benefit of Sanders' wife. I find myself wondering if RPattz already knew about it. I'd like to think that he did, and was like, "gross, he's 41 you grosso" and moved on. They must have some understanding of when they're on set, stuff happens. That being said, it's a lot harder to be cool about messing around when the whole world doesn't know that it happened. That's an added pressure to a relationship. I can't see them staying together much longer, but I'd be happy to be pleasantly surprised. For their ages, I;m surprised they've been together this long.
p.s. I really find the term "full retard" offensive.
I find that offensive as well. We are supposed to be "enlightened" on this blog. Equal rights and all, correct? Boycotting AG because of CFA, but it is ok to say "retard"? I love ya, ZL, but it isn't ok to say that word.
Check this out...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T549VoLca_Q
Well when a person says "full retard" they are acknowledging the origin of the phrase, a movie in which exploitation of those with mental disabilities was called out for being crass. So I have never really thought of that phrase as being even remotely connected with the mocking of the mentally disabled.
And since there are often many layers of intent and interpretation when it comes to words (this blog's voice doesn't really stay in one position after all, it jumps all over the place from righteous to pervy to snarky assholery) have always maintained that words aren't really something anybody should be afraid of, and that to police one's language too stridently is to push in the other direction of progress. So I don't really care of Eminem or Louis CK says "faggot" but I do care if someone publicly patronizes Chick Fil A. It's not as simple as actions speaking louder than words, but it mostly is.
I truly understand your point of view, and I have always disliked the policing of words. But, if a group of people ban together and say that they feel offended by a word when do we start respecting that "offense"?
Um, never, I guess? Like, can you think of ANY words that have actually been banned? Can you think of ANY offensive words over which the debate about whether or not they are offensive is not still raging? Language just isn't something we will ever or should ever police. You correct the attitude behind the speech, not the speech itself. You know?
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